15 July 2010

It's a Cruel Memory to Look Back on Who We Were.

Life imitates art imitating life....
I've had a song stuck in my head for days, so naturally I've used lines from it as my status on Facebook (because in reality what are we but a string of song lyrics) and a dear friend made a comment that seems to have put me on guard, and has left me with the need to explain myself if for no other reason then because I want to.
Normally, a comment on my page would go overlooked, I don't pay much attention to how others view me... but when I actually value someones opinion it's another story. My status was,

"It's a cruel memory to look back on who we were."

I felt / feel it's fitting for me at the moment. The comment which was left is, "or a harsh reality of who we've become." which I can understand but is not where my mind has been.

As I have said before, I have no regrets in my life. I have done more in my short time here (yes, I see 29 years as a short time) than most do in a lifetime. (I could... and possibly will fill a book with the tales of my ventures)
Let me rant for a moment, (blame the after work wine) as I've said before I don't regret a bit of my past. (not even the clover tattoo) I cherish the good - it as left me with amazing memories, experiences, and people that I hold dear to my heart. I've learned from the bad... and if given the chance I wouldn't change it.

I'm not sure why this song has struck a cord with me, maybe it's because I think Wes Borland is attractive, maybe it's because I like his voice on the track, maybe it's because I've recently reconnected with people from my past and I've been reminiscing, maybe it's just a good song... I do know I am happy with who I am, I'm comfortable in my own skin, and I can and will do anything that I set my mind to.

My cruel memories? They are amazing moments in my life that I only wish could last a bit longer...

"Take me away, I might as well be yours."



"Cruel Melody" by Black Light Burns.
If I could paint your picture
I'd paint you as the sea
I'd let your arms become the tide

If I could fall into you
I'd let you swallow me
So I could see you from the inside

And it's a cruel melody
That you sing when I'm away
Trying to find where the sun shines
In a land that's turning gray
And it's a cruel memory
To look back on who we were
'cause my past is a poison
And I'll never find a cure

If I could break a promise
I'd tell 1000 lies
To have you look at me again

But your heart is empty of me
I see it in your eyes
It wasn't meant for me to win

And it's a cruel melody
That you sing when I'm away
Trying to find where the sun shines
In a land that's turning gray
And it's a cruel memory
To look back on who we were
'cause my past is a poison
And I'll never find a cure

Take me away, I might as well be yours

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